I’m sorry about your situation. I’m lucky that my health is good and my job is secure now, but after my divorce I was in really deep. It made me sick to even think about my financial situation. And ashamed. It helped to get every single debt, assest, income, and expense into a budget. I cried for about two days to see it all in black and red, but it wouldn’t have gotten better if I didn’t start there. In my area of Iowa we have Horizons, it’s a community service organization that has financial counseling as one of their services. It’s free and was really helpful. Maybe there’s something like that in your area? Now that I’m digging out I can see that some of it was bad decisions, but most of it was just situational. I don’t feel ashamed anymore. I wish you the very best of luck.